Voluntary Vulnerability - The Art of Redeeming Ourselves with an Open Heart
By jona bryndis, Aug 13 2016 03:00PM
What good does it do us to understand the concept of love & redemption with our minds but never bringing it into expression through our open heart? You may think now, that this is easier said than done, especially if you hasve a track-record of painful relationship experiences…What is it really needed to love with an open heart?
Most humans either use love to control pain, or create pain to control love.
Of course, neither love nor pain can be controlled! All we can do is to open ourselves up for the experience and allow things to evolve. And as we all know, consciousness can only evolve through experiencing, therefore both are needed to love with an open heart. Together they provide the most advanced spiritual tool for transcending the limitations on our physical life’s journey and living life to the fullest. What would life be without pain and love?
Pain is an important tool for human learning and love is the energetic pathway to enlightenment. Love can only be experienced if allowed - the voluntary act of opening ourselves up. We don’t need permission and we don't need an object of love, either. Love is the stuff we’re made of and therefore our most natural state of being!
If love is expressed free of the ego's motivation to control, is can lead into the higher vibratory state of detachment and voluntary vulnerability - an inner agreement to allow and express true feelings transcending the fear of pain and letting go of trying to control the outcome.
Energetically seen, most of us spend the majority of our energy/power dealing with the pain-aspect of Love, seldom reflecting yet often defending ... We feel victimized and close our hearts out of fear to get hurt again. What we don’t realize is that the damage is not the pain itself but our fear-based reaction to it. Closing our hearts is one of the single most damaging energetic blocks and main causes for our inability to become who we truly are. It cuts us off from our source of energy and increases our affinity to lower vibratory energetic and emotional states. Basically, closing our heart is the cause for all not only lack or trust and intimacy in relatonships, but also overall stagnation, misery and powerlessness!
The biggest limitation is favoring our conditioned ego control and it’s rigid attachment to attacking and defending versus staying open. What makes us strong is not the control we have over a person or situation but our ability to know when it’s needed to stand our ground and fight or better to be open, soft and allowing. True Inner Power is in the balance of our inner masculine working synergistically with our inner feminine energies to overcome our innate dualistic conflict between our ego-mind and heart.
Sure, often our intention is damage control, and sometimes closing our heart is needed to survive extreme trauma, crisis or abuse is all we can show up with. But if we allow this temporary state of dissociation from our True Self to become permanent, our life’s journey is pretty much set to loop in the endless confusion of who we truely are. Layer upon layer of defense and coping alter our perception of self and reality, which can then lead to the manifestion of repeatingly unhealthy coping patterns (see keyword addiction) and toxic relationships.
What if we could learn a way to change your hostile view of love and pain and embrace the opportunity to tap into one of our most powerful creation energies instead?
Follow me through this exercise in changing views and perceptions based on Lesson 26 of ‘A Course in Miracles’ below:
Jona's Contemplation on Vulnerability
As we have discovered, Self and Ego Mind are not the same. However, this differentiation is not possible for the untrained consciousness. Discernment has to be learned. Our innate confusion between our lower self, our higher Self, the 'I' and our ego identification has made it impossible to remember who we truely are. The experience of deep inner pain and wounding as a result of this confusion has blinded us. The true fallacy of self is not our shadow but our lost ability to discern truth. And so, in the end it comes that our learning process is nothing but a relearning of how to love and live with an open heart.
In our pursuit to learn discernment between ego and true perception, which increases our consciousness, we have not only learned that our perception, our thoughts, emotions, reactions but also the meaning we give to the world and life itself are in fact distorted through our ego's propensity for self-gain and therefore the cause of all illusion and confusion in life and Self.
UNDERSTANDING & TRANSCENDING OUR ATTACK CYCLE:
Our perception of reality is determined by our ego perception, which is determined by our thoughts, emotions and physical sensations. Our thoughts are determined by how we view the world. If the world is experienced as hostile, which it is for most of us, the way we view ourselves is therefore determined by our ego's first response of fight, flight or freeze. Our consciousness however is determined by our choices. Our choices are determined by our intentions and the meaning/purpose/context we give them.
With an untrained consciousness the meaning we give to our experience is determined by our ego.
Thoughts of the untrained ego-mind are based on fear. This fear originates in the ego, fearing to be uncovered while it pretends to be Self. From the viewpoint of the ego-mind the world is a fearful place; it feels constantly attacked and in need of defense.
If our ego is determined by fear, then fear determines our perceptions. This determines also our projections, which in return help us to alter our experiences into a more bearable version of reality. Our experiences determine our reactions. But our reactions are based on fear, attack and defense. And so, if our perceptions, projections, experiences and reactions are based on attack and defense, we are in fact constantly attacking ourselves!
This is an important realization. We can now begin to understand that the origin of all our suffering is based on ego and its attack/defense/coping mechanisms.
Understanding this can lead us to compassion, and compassion can lead to a higher level of inner reconciliation. Forgiveness can lead us to empathy, and empathy can lead to Love. Love is based on Self-Love, which can lead us to relinquishing the need to attack and defend - and finally reconcile all versions of self.
By surrendering the need to attack and defend and choosing to become vulnerable, we are expressing Self-Love.
To prepare us for this view, is the purpose of this lesson. By learning that our fears are in fact energetic self-attacks and the opposite of Love and Self-Love, we can learn to face our fears, while we learn to challenge them.
For today, try to contemplate about these statements and follow the exercise given by the Course below. If you can, try to become aware of the attacking nature of your ego-perception and begin to discern which part of you is doing/seeing/choosing what. Is it your lower self, your higher Self or the 'I' that identifies with what you are experiencing?
Lesson 26 A Course of Miracles - My Attack Thoughts are Attacking my Invulnerability
The idea for today introduces the thought that you always attack yourself first. If attack thoughts must entail the belief that you are vulnerable, their effect is to weaken you in your own eyes. Thus they have attacked your perception of yourself. And because you believe in them, you can no longer believe in yourself. A false image of yourself has come to take the place of what you are.
The practice with this idea will help you to understand that vulnerability or invulnerability is the result of your own thoughts. Nothing except your thoughts can attack you. Nothing except your thoughts can make you think you are vulnerable. And nothing except your thoughts can prove to you this is not so.
With repeating the idea for today, then closing your eyes and reviewing the unresolved questions whose outcomes are causing you concern. The concern may take the form of depression, worry, anger, a sense of imposition, fear, foreboding or preoccupation. Any problem as yet unsettled that tends to recur in your thoughts during the day is a suitable subject. You will not be able to use very many for any one practice period, because a longer time than usual should be spent with each one. Today's idea should be applied as follows:
First, name the situation:
I am concerned about ______.
Then go over every possible outcome that has occurred to you in that connection and which has caused you concern, referring to each one quite specifically, saying:
I am afraid ______ will happen.
If you are doing the exercises properly, you should have some five or six distressing possibilities available for each situation you use, and quite possibly more. It is much more helpful to cover a few situations thoroughly than to touch on a larger number. As the list of anticipated outcomes for each situation continues, you will probably find some of them, especially those that occur to you toward the end, less acceptable to you. Try, however, to treat them all alike to whatever extent you can.
After you have named each outcome of which you are afraid, tell yourself:
That thought is an attack upon myself.
Conclude each practice period by repeating today's idea to yourself once more
Thank you for your time!
energy healer & founder of transCODES
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